15 Things A Bride Should Never Say To Her Bridesmaids: Keeping Friendship Intact

15 Things A Bride Should Never Say To Her Bridesmaids: Keeping Friendship Intact

When planning your wedding, having supportive bridesmaids can make a huge difference in your experience. The words you choose when speaking to them are crucial in maintaining a positive atmosphere.

Bridesmaids receiving insensitive comments from a bride

Creating an environment of kindness and gratitude sets the tone for a joyful celebration. By being mindful of your words, you’ll foster stronger relationships with your bridesmaids, ensuring they feel valued and respected throughout the process.

1) “I hated my dress.”

A discarded, crumpled dress lies on the floor, surrounded by scattered bridesmaid dresses

Telling your bridesmaids that you hated your wedding dress can be demoralizing for them. They might feel uncomfortable about their own dresses. It might also make them worry that their opinions will be ignored.

Instead, keep the focus on how happy you are that they are part of your special day. This will create a positive and supportive atmosphere.

2) “You should lose weight for the wedding.”

A bride telling her bridesmaids to lose weight for the wedding

Asking your bridesmaids to lose weight isn’t kind. It can hurt their feelings and damage your friendship. It’s better to focus on their support and happiness.

Everyone wants to look nice, but making such a request can cause stress. Let your bridesmaids know you appreciate them as they are.

3) “You’re just my backup.”

A bride dismisses her bridesmaids as "just my backup" with a dismissive tone

Saying “You’re just my backup” can really hurt feelings. It makes your bridesmaid feel unimportant.

Everyone wants to feel valued. Letting them know they are second choice can damage your relationship.

Choose your words wisely. Your bridesmaids are there to support you, so show them the same respect.

4) “You don’t have to give a speech.”

Bridesmaids stand awkwardly as the bride insists, "No speeches." Tension fills the room as they exchange uneasy glances

When you tell your bridesmaids “You don’t have to give a speech,” it might sound like you’re letting them off the hook.

They might take it the wrong way and think their words don’t matter to you.

Encourage them instead, letting them know their thoughts and feelings are important. They’ll appreciate the chance to contribute to your special day.

5) “You can wear whatever.”

A bride gestures nonchalantly, saying "You can wear whatever." Bridesmaids look confused and uncertain

Telling your bridesmaids they can wear whatever can cause confusion and stress. Without guidance, they might not know what matches the wedding theme.

It’s better to give some direction on colors and styles. This helps everyone feel comfortable and look coordinated in your wedding photos.

6) “Don’t worry about the cost.”

A bride dismisses cost concerns to her bridesmaids

Telling your bridesmaids not to worry about the cost can be insensitive.

They might not have the same budget as you. Expenses for dresses, shoes, and travel can add up quickly.

Make sure to consider their financial situations and try to choose affordable options.

Your friends will appreciate your thoughtfulness and effort to accommodate everyone’s budget.

7) “I wish someone else could be my maid of honor.”

The bride expresses a desire for a different maid of honor

Saying this can hurt your maid of honor’s feelings deeply.

She may feel like she’s not good enough for the role.

Instead, talk about any specific concerns you have directly and kindly.

This can help solve problems without making her feel unwanted.

8) “You don’t need a plus one.”

A bride dismisses the need for a plus one to her bridesmaids

Being told you don’t need a plus one can make you feel left out or undervalued.

You might be excited to bring your partner or friend to share this special day.

It’s important to remember everyone wants someone to enjoy the event with.

9) “Can you change your hair?”

A bride gestures towards her hair, while her bridesmaids look on with hesitant expressions

It’s important to respect your bridesmaids’ personal choices, especially when it comes to their hair. Asking them to change their hair for your wedding can feel intrusive.

Your bridesmaids chose their hairstyle because it suits them. Encourage them to feel comfortable as they support you on your special day. Plus, their natural look will add to the genuine beauty of your wedding.

10) “I’m not interested in your ideas.”

A bride dismisses her bridesmaids' ideas

Your bridesmaids likely want to help make your wedding special. Dismissing their ideas can hurt their feelings.

Being open to their suggestions shows you value their opinions. Even if you don’t use their ideas, listening and thanking them goes a long way.

Consider their thoughts and find ways to incorporate them, bringing everyone closer.

11) “Just be there, it’s no big deal.”

Bridesmaids stand awkwardly as bride dismisses their concerns

Telling your bridesmaids to “just be there” can make them feel unimportant. They might think you don’t value all the time and effort they put into your big day.

It’s important to acknowledge their effort and show appreciation for their support. They are there to help make your special day memorable, so let them know they matter.

12) “I don’t care if you’re uncomfortable.”

A bride scolds her bridesmaids, disregarding their discomfort

It’s not nice to ignore your bridesmaids’ feelings.

Telling them you don’t care if they’re uncomfortable can hurt their feelings.

Try to be considerate and listen to their concerns.

13) “Why don’t you look more excited?”

A bride scolds her unenthusiastic bridesmaid

It can make your bridesmaids feel pressured or even hurt their feelings. Everyone shows their excitement differently.

Remember, they are happy for you, even if it doesn’t show on their faces. Enjoy the moment without worrying about their reactions.

14) “Stop complaining.”

It’s natural for everyone to have off days, but telling your bridesmaids to “stop complaining” can come across as dismissive.

Your bridesmaids are there to support you, and they might be dealing with stress too.

Instead, listen to their concerns and offer a kind word. This will make them feel valued and understood.

15) “You better not upstage me.”

Saying “You better not upstage me” can hurt your bridesmaids’ feelings.

They want to support you, not compete with you.

Trust that they know it’s your special day. Focus on enjoying the moment together.

The Impact of Communication on Bridesmaid

Navigating Sensitive Topics

When planning your wedding, it’s easy to unintentionally touch on sensitive subjects with your bridesmaids. Keep their feelings and situations in mind to maintain harmony and support.

Addressing Financial Concerns

Weddings can be expensive, and not everyone has the same budget. Be considerate when choosing dresses, shoes, or other expenses.

Ask your bridesmaids about their financial limits before making decisions.

You might consider split payments or chipping in for certain items. Offer options that can be worn multiple times or are more affordable.

Understand that everyone’s situation is different and be flexible.

Communication is key. Don’t assume everyone can afford everything. If you make adjustments or plans to help with costs, they will appreciate your understanding and support.

Handling Personal Boundaries

Every bridesmaid has her own comfort level. Be clear about expectations, but also ask about their preferences.

Some may not want to participate in all activities or might have restrictions on travel or time commitments.

Avoid assuming they’ll be available at all times.

Schedule meetings or events in advance so they can plan accordingly.

Make sure to talk about the roles and tasks they feel comfortable handling.

Respecting personal space and time goes a long way.

Let everyone contribute in ways that are meaningful to them. This makes the experience enjoyable for everyone involved.

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