Why Did Elizabeth Say Obey in Her Vows? Exploring the Tradition and Meaning Behind Wedding Promises

When Queen Elizabeth II married Prince Philip in 1947, her choice to include the word “obey” in her wedding vows surprised many. While most modern couples leave this word out, the Queen felt it was an important part of her commitment. Her decision reflects a blend of tradition and personal significance that shaped her views on marriage and duty as a royal.

A woman's silhouette standing before an altar, facing a figure of authority with a solemn expression, as if making a promise

You might wonder what led her to keep this word, especially when the Church of England began to phase it out around that time. For Elizabeth, saying “to love, to cherish, and to obey” was more than just following tradition; it symbolized her dedication to her husband and the responsibilities that came with being a queen. This choice sparked discussions about the role of women and the expectations placed on them in marriage.

As you explore this fascinating topic, you’ll uncover the deeper meanings behind her vows and how they resonate in today’s world. The story of Queen Elizabeth’s wedding is not just about a royal ceremony; it’s about commitment, identity, and the complexities of balancing love with duty.

Historical Context of Obedience in Royal Vows

A queen standing before a royal court, holding a regal scepter, as she speaks her vows with authority and determination

In royal wedding vows, the concept of obedience has deep historical roots. This section will explore the origins of the word “obey” in wedding vows and Queen Elizabeth II’s significant decision to include it during her ceremony.

Origins of ‘Obey’ in Wedding Vows

The tradition of including “obey” in wedding vows can be traced back to the Book of Common Prayer, established by the Church of England in the 16th century. This book laid out standard prayers and vows for various religious ceremonies.

In traditional wedding vows, particularly in Catholic and some other denominations, the word represented a commitment of the wife to her husband. It reflects historical views on marriage where the husband was seen as the head of the household.

However, modern views have shifted, and many couples choose to omit this term to emphasize equality in marriage. This change highlights evolving attitudes towards the roles of partners.

Queen Elizabeth II’s Decision

When Queen Elizabeth II married Prince Philip in 1947, she made a bold choice to keep “obey” in her vows. This decision stood out at a time when many were beginning to question traditional marriage roles.

By stating her commitment to “love, cherish, and obey,” she honored historical customs while also intertwining her personal faith with her royal duties. Many saw this as a strong statement about her dedication to both marriage and the Church of England.

While her choice may have sparked debate, it demonstrated her connection to royal traditions and the weight of her role as Queen. Elizabeth’s commitment reflects her understanding of duty, aligning her marriage vows with her responsibilities to the monarchy.

Personal and Public Responses

A woman stands before a crowd, speaking confidently with a determined expression. Her words are met with a mix of surprise and approval from the onlookers

The inclusion of the word “obey” in Queen Elizabeth II’s wedding vows sparked a variety of reactions, both at the time and in later years. These responses show how societal values and family dynamics influence interpretations of tradition.

Initial Public Reception

When Queen Elizabeth II married Prince Philip in 1947, many people were surprised she included the word “obey.” At that time, traditional roles were still common, and this decision was seen as a commitment to her husband.

However, some people viewed it as outdated. Critics felt it had negative connotations, especially as the women’s suffrage movement gained momentum. For young women inspired by figures like Princess Diana, the notion of submission seemed outdated, prompting debates about women’s roles in marriage.

The royal family faced scrutiny, as Elizabeth would become a queen. Why should she promise to obey a husband of lower rank? This question highlighted a disconnect between her royal duties and personal life.

Modern Interpretations

In recent years, attitudes towards marriage vows have evolved. Many people, including figures like Kate Middleton and Meghan Markle, have chosen vows emphasizing partnership and equality. This shift reflects broader societal changes regarding relationships.

Critics and supporters alike have also revisited the meaning of “obey.” For some, it represents duty and respect, while others connect it to outdated ideas and potential issues like domestic violence.

Shows like The Crown have further fueled conversations about the dynamics within the royal family. Discussions are not just about tradition; they delve into what love and commitment mean in today’s context.

Impact on Future Royal Marriages

A bride standing at an altar, facing a groom, with a priest officiating the wedding ceremony

The decision by Queen Elizabeth to include the word “obey” in her wedding vows has shaped the landscape of royal marriages. This choice sparked discussions about tradition versus modernity, influencing future royal brides in their own vows and expectations in marriage.

Changes in Royal Wedding Traditions

When Queen Elizabeth married the Duke of Edinburgh in 1947, her choice to say “obey” reflected the customs of her time. This promise was part of traditional marriage vows, which many held dear.

However, after her wedding, the Church of England made the word “obey” optional in the 1928 wedding service. As a result, future royal brides began to reassess this tradition.

For example, Princess Diana did not include “obey” in her vows when marrying Prince Charles in 1981. This shift signaled a change that many saw as more aligned with contemporary views on marriage.

Influence on Contemporary Royal Brides

Modern royal brides now face the legacy of these earlier decisions. Kate Middleton chose to include the more modern phrasing in her vows when marrying Prince William. This aligns with the more egalitarian views on marriage today.

Similarly, Meghan Markle decided against using “obey” in her vows to Prince Harry. This choice reflects a broader trend where individual preferences outweigh tradition.

By actively shaping their marriage promises, these brides foster a vision of a happy marriage based on mutual respect and equality. This evolution in royal wedding traditions shows how the past can influence and pave the way for future practices.

Cultural Significance in Society

A bride standing before a religious symbol, with a solemn expression, speaking her vows to her partner

The inclusion of “obey” in Elizabeth’s wedding vows sparked discussions about marriage traditions and the evolving role of women. This section looks at how these vows reflect broader themes in marriage and the monarchy’s place in society.

Reflections on Marriage Equality

In recent years, the marriage service has shifted towards equality and partnership. The promise to “love, honor, and obey” has been challenged as ideas about relationships change.

Many couples today view marriage as a partnership where both share responsibilities and choices. This view contrasts with traditional promises that positioned men as leaders and women as followers.

For you, understanding this shift helps clarify current marriage expectations. Legally and socially, the move towards equality emphasizes mutual respect and support in a relationship. The debates triggered by royal practices, like Elizabeth’s vows at Westminster Abbey, resonate with modern conversations around marriage equality.

The Role of Monarchy and Tradition

The monarchy carries a rich history of traditions that often reflect societal values. When Queen Elizabeth chose to say “obey,” it highlighted the historical weight of her position.

Royal marriages not only symbolize personal vows but also national identity. The choices made in these ceremonies can influence public perceptions about marriage.

Even today, many royal ceremonies include traditions that might seem outdated. For example, having separate bedrooms, a practice that symbolizes both independence and commitment, reflects the complexity of royal lives. This can remind you that while traditions hold significance, they are always evolving alongside societal changes.

The royal marriage encapsulates both personal commitment and cultural significance, shaping discussions about modern relationships.